Summer Transfer Window

Yesterday caused a bit of emotional turmoil for two major reasons.

In the early hours of the morning, shortly after I awoke from the sound of rain on the skylight, I received a text message from the LFC Twitter page saying that today, finally, Liverpool Football Club would be announcing the fate of Xabi Alonso. This put me at great unease, and I drifted back into unsettling dreams in which I received a dizzying multitude of Twitter update texts.

It was day two of training for my new job, in which I would be a traveling photographer. After being laid off from Job 1, as a clerk for a poorly planned government project, nearly a month ago, I was lucky enough to get Job 2 just days later. Though I wasn't thrilled about the travel or hours of Job 2, beggars can't be choosers and the job itself was interesting and exciting. Midway through the day I got a call from my old boss at Job 1. Rumors that had been circulating around the laid-off staff were confirmed. They're hiring again. Emotional turmoil ensued, and the crushing necessity of making a fast decision on such a huge matter as one's job and livelihood.

I am often rash in my decision making, opting to think things over shortly and on surface level, make my choice, and only later suffer the agony of all the what-ifs and why-thens. Often things do work out for the best, or, if not the best (for one can never really know how the option one didn't pick would have turned out) than for the acceptable. But I loathe the prospect of being cornered by two major choices, two future paths, and knowing no progress can be made until a decision is reached.

The summer transfer dealings of soccer teams are similar, yet vastly different. Teams buy, sell, and loan players across oceans and cultures. There is much waiting, deliberating, negotiating, planning, agonizing, hoping, and praying. Fans, players, teams, managers are cornered in an endless cycle of rumors, training, deals, and contracts.

Alonso has been waiting for quite some time for his transfer from Liverpool to Real Madrid to go through. Myself, I was waiting for that call from Job 1 for nearly a month. When it came and I made my decision to go back to Job 1 and run the (admittedly high) risk of being again jerked around and possibly re-laid off by corporate in exchange for a job I'm good at in a place I like, an extreme sense of relief came over me. I am sure Xabi felt the same upon the announcement that he will be sold to Madrid for 30 million Euro. I am selling myself for far less: A bit above minimum wage with the potential for unemployment this time around, minus the mileage check Job 2 would have provided but with the knowledge that my sad little car (which would never have survived a collision with a deer on a narrow Wisconsin backroad) is that much safer for the time being.

The summer transfer windows for Xabi and me have been closed, the drapes drawn. We are where we want to be, the next season is rapidly approaching, and relief is in the air. Still, I must admit that despite the drama of having to choose between Job 1 and 2 after four short hours of stressed deliberation, I was more emotionally drained by the mid-afternoon text confirming Alonso's departure. It's lonely round the fields of Anfield Road.